Chris Rock doesn't do that, ... They're paying me my normal rate like I was doing a theater or college. So I'm there. Me in someone's living room.


Kathy Griffin

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I love Kathy Griffin, I think she's brilliant, but for me, there is a line when I go OK, that...
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I would have rather been beat by a plumber than Kathy Griffin.
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When I was a teenager, my dad watched my films and told me I could go to art college and study anima...
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To me, the stage is like my living room, or my home, and when you come over to my house, I have to b...
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They wanted me to do what I could do, doing things on my own, so I'd be ready for college.
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I was thinking that I was gonna have, like, Jason Kidd or Chris Thomas star in the movie to play me.
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The recruiters came and talked with us in school, and I remember it like yesterday. I wasn't interes...
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As I started doing really well, some college coaches started to notice me. By the end of my junior y...
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When someone was hitting me, or like sexually molesting me, it just seemed normal to continue to do ...
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I think Chris Rock at the Oscars was a great example. I thought that was intellectually hilarious. T...
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[So what was it like meeting him?] I didn't meet Chris Martin, ... He met me.
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I think my first big purchase was actually for my mom. She had one of those '90s TVs in her livi...
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Life is like farting in front of someone and then trying to convince him, you didn't fart. It's hard...
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Realizing you have something in common with another person makes you more human than you were yester...
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If a fangirl tells you she likes you, you better be happy. Her standards are very high.
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When I was in college, I was in the theater department, which for anyone who has been involved in an...
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when im mad i usually punch a wall but that doesnt work so when your mad you dont need to punch a wa...
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Chris Rock does the political thing really well, but that never worked for me.
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My father is a Marine. My brother is a Marine. I almost became a Marine. I'm no stranger to figh...
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I didn't think that a career in theater was very realistic so I thought the only thing I could make ...
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When I was in college in Philly, there was a lot of post-punks... hardcore... like, rock. Sixties, r...
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I'd say, for my freshman year in college, I was doing everything in my power to hide the fact th...
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KEITH HARING
My mom wasn't a fan of public school systems. She was scared of letting me go. So, she home-scho...
BRITT ROBERTSON
Quite honestly, if I were doing work related to a living being or historical being where there was v...
DANIEL DAY-LEWIS
It's definitely a passion on ours. For me, it's like paying it forward. I'm living proof of what you...
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...being Lulu, it made me realize that all my life I've been living in a small, square room, with no...
GAYLE FORMAN
I can't believe I'm watching what I'm watching. That's my living room. That was my living room.
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When I was 4, my parents took me to see a musical, and I was like, 'I want to do that!' I st...
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I like Chris Rock. He's dangerous.
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Before, I didn't do celebrity stuff, 'cause Kathy Griffin did that, but now, if you're g...
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When my father became vice president, I was a sophomore in high school. I'd do things like go on...
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I was working all the time I was in college. I was working so much that I could hardly do my college...
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I was a dramatic kid. I was always like, 'Watch me put on my play, Mom and Dad! You have to watc...
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Being a rock widow is not my job, so I would hire people to do it for me.
COURTNEY LOVE
I thought I was going to be a theater actor. I moved to New York after college and did some plays an...
ZACHARY KNIGHTON
Anxiety kicked in. I lacked people skills all my life. Any normal human interaction was foreign to m...
TIA ARTEMIS
I was in New York for a little while, doing some really bad theater. I did some great stuff, too, bu...
SILAS WEIR MITCHELL
I'm homemade. I upload my videos in my living room; I edit everything, and I upload on my laptop...
MICHELLE PHAN
There are so few guys who do action and do it well. Even fewer who are African-American. Even fewer ...
WESLEY SNIPES
I grew up with gang violence. They tried to suck me in, but I wouldn't do it. I kinda got sucked in ...
DEMAUNDRAY WOOLRIDGE
For me, hour-long drama was always the thing I felt the most comfortable doing, and I've played ...
KATE BURTON
Why do people want to know exactly who I am? Am I a poet? Am I this or that? I've always made pe...
PATTI SMITH
I had a very active imagination as a kid, and I was constantly performing, whether I was making mone...
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Never felt lyk im alone bcoz my soul always follows me dats wat make me feel im not alone & I"ll nev...
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I realised the bohemian life was not for me. I would look around at my friends, living like starving...
P. J. O'ROURKE
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TERRY J. LUNDGREN
There was a time in my life that my mother told me that they didn't know whether they were going...
ELLEN GREENE
If I could do theater during the hiatus and then do '30 Rock' in the winter, that would be m...
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I'm a big fan of Katt Williams, Jim Gaffigan, Louie CK, Margaret Cho, Kathy Griffin, Rich Vas, J...
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LINDSEY STIRLING
Mum and Dad always wanted me to do whatever I was happy doing. I nearly went to art college at 16, b...
STEPHEN GRAHAM
In the beginning, I was frightened to death of going solo. Especially when doing live shows, I was s...
CHARLIE WILSON
I want to do work that means something to me so that when I go to work at the theater eight times a ...
BILLY PORTER
I was living in Evanston, Illinois and I was taking theater classes down the street, and our theater...
LECY GORANSON
I'm from Washington state - a pretty small town there called Puyallup. I was really into the art...
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every body thinks im this cheerful littel person with a wonderful smile but the truth is i hide behi...
AMBER FAITH HUN
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And then the line was quite but not dead. I almost felt like he was there in my room with me, but in...
JOHN GREEN
Kathy told me she honestly thought they'd be home in three days, so they didn't pack a lot.
JULIE BUCHANAN
It represents me. My old room was from when I was 6 or 7. This room is more up-to-date.
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Starship was a whole different thing. It was pop rock. It made more money and had more hit songs tha...
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HAROLD RAMIS
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EL DEBARGE
I was a man who thrived on solitude; without it I was like another man without food or water. Each d...
CHARLES BUKOWSKI
[Looks at Frank after a show] You know, I was wondering what you were doing over there. I was like, ...
GERARD WAY
I grew up in the age of radio. That was my main boyhood form of entertainment: lying on the living r...
GEORGE TAKEI
I've been blessed to have insanely hip parents who think of me as their little Chris Rock.
AISHA TYLER
I didn't do improv in college, I never performed, I didn't do theater either. I was in stude...
DEMETRI MARTIN
I knew the words to 25 rock songs, so I got in the group. Long Tall Sally and Tutti-Frutti, that got...
PAUL MCCARTNEY
It was all encompassing and so hard for me to do any classes or take up any hobbies - I'd wake u...
BECKY LYNCH
Do not go in there; do not sign with this company, or you'll end up like me - screwed and out on the...
JOE STRUMMER
There is a long tradition of pungent living in the South. It was wonderful to have that imprinted on...
SISSY SPACEK
Things that make me laugh range from a wonderful stand-up like Jerry Seinfeld, Louis C.K. and Chris ...
JASON ALEXANDER
You know me. I'm going to try my best to get in everybody's living room.
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My whole life growing up, both my parents told me not to swear like a sailor. After college, I recal...
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When I was a kid, I wanted to walk with my dad's limp - my dad was my hero - but that infuriated...
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If you see me on Friday, you'll see different material on Saturday night.
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I hate it, it is tedious... when I write for my act, it is very improvisational, I write bullet poin...
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I have to tell you, though, the sexism in late night talk is so profound.
KATHY GRIFFIN
I love Mariah Carey. Remember the breakdown? I loved the breakdown.
KATHY GRIFFIN
I also love Mole, the unsung hero of reality programming.
KATHY GRIFFIN
Oh, I constantly say things that I regret. I mortify myself constantly. But that's just part of ...
KATHY GRIFFIN
I constantly say things that I regret. I mortify myself constantly.
KATHY GRIFFIN
And you can't exhale,
KATHY GRIFFIN
Pretty much everywhere I go, I'm pretty much thinking I'm going to be bounced. I am still th...
KATHY GRIFFIN
My fear of camping: I’m convinced bugs will crawl up my vagina and lay eggs. Isn’t everyone?
KATHY GRIFFIN
I'm also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It's going to be a spoof o...
KATHY GRIFFIN
A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had...
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It always pisses me off when I’m calling in to some Morning Zoo radio show to promote God-only-kno...
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Life is adventure. Travel is adventure at a different address.
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This one guy Roland was so weird that during sex his voice altered—as if he were a fucking alien�...
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And Don Cheadle and Andy Garcia are just sitting there. They are the real meat and bones of that cas...
KATHY GRIFFIN
We're so used to seeing celebrities being driven around in limos. I can go to an In-N-Out Burger whe...
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Put your eyebrows on the night stand and hang up the phone. He has lady eyebrows; pretty, drag-queen...
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KATHY GRIFFIN: MY LIFE ON THE D-LIST ... To Kathy Griffin. Warmest wishes, Renee Zellweger.
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What I would really love is to be on a sitcom again, ... Everybody talks about Desperate Housewives ...
KATHY GRIFFIN
[Listen to the way she talks up, and down, Angelina Jolie:] I think the work she does for the ambass...
KATHY GRIFFIN
Gwyneth Paltrow names her kid Apple. I'm not going to let that stand.
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We're eating Ramen Noodles chicken and beef that's what we eat everyday.
AHMAD GRIFFIN
We ain't got no family out here. All the football team that's our family.
AHMAD GRIFFIN
We're eating Ramen Noodles — chicken and beef â€...
AHMAD GRIFFIN
We ain't got no family out here. All the football team — that's our...
AHMAD GRIFFIN
I know that they are all right, I just don't know where they at.
AHMAD GRIFFIN
I believe our health care system is in drastic need of innovative, patient-centered reforms that enc...
TIM GRIFFIN
My inspiration to do comedy came from many places. Saturday mornings, I would watch Bob Hope and Jer...
ERIK GRIFFIN
He commended us on how great a win it was. That would have been a devastating loss. He didn't really...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
I felt something pop in there. I'll wait and see how it feels.
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
But he can't go out on the court and play. We have to take some accountability as players.
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
We got the win, it didn't matter how ugly it was. We needed to get back on track.
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Guys get hurt and other guys have got to pull their weight and pick up the slack. We don't make excu...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
We just followed the game plan. Defending those guys is just a total team effort.
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We've got excellent scorers. Why do they need me to take shots away from them? I know what I need to...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
I think that is why we came out with a lot of energy. We know he is capable of putting up big number...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
Whoever guarded him played with a lot of energy. Fortunately, he didn't get going like he usually ca...
ADRIAN GRIFFIN
It starts with the coach. He gets us ready. We're very prepared. You look at our second unit, even o...
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It is Joplin, the wind is usually blowing in Joplin. You can open your window and get a pretty decen...
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This is the annual time of year for the air-conditioning complaint.
ADAM GRIFFIN
This is the best attendance we've had in three or four years. I appreciate the work the body has don...
ADAM GRIFFIN
We've had a high demand on single rooms. They are paying more for them, so we wanted to offer them m...
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The more I heard that I couldn't make it, the more I was determined to do it. I never liked being to...
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We got fatigued (from the press). I think our legs started getting out of our shots and they were ri...
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We had everything it took this year to get over the hump. We just didn't execute.
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The second one, I thought it was going to fall.
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President Obama's policies have been categorical failures for our country. Unemployment is over ...
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We have to work harder to show distinction.
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Same thing they did in the regular season. Fastballs, change-ups, he's just not swinging good.
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He said he is hitting the ball right at somebody.
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Now everything has got a seal on it.
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For the public, we wanted to make it easier and more convenient to access health information.
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This is building community by putting people on the streets. That is what makes cities work.
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You should be happy to go to work every day.
BRENDA GRIFFIN
I can't tell you one.
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I can leave knowing that this school is operating smoothly.
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BRENDA GRIFFIN
I'm walking into what seems to be the perfect situation.
BRENDA GRIFFIN
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The operating schedule is a collective decision based on a monstrous review a couple years back.
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I would hope [students] would understand we don't arbitrarily look to raise the board rate.
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We are kicking it off next week and the plan is have it deployed by fall.
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She has a very patron-oriented point of view.
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Just because I was almost 62, I did not feel decrepit and felt I wasn't finished being a soldier...
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Las Vegas without Wayne Newton is like Disneyland without Mickey Mouse.
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Documentaries have always inspired me in narrative filmmaking.
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Everyone who is born holds dual citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the si...
SUSAN GRIFFIN
In one sense I feel that my book is a one-woman argument against determinism.
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We've tried everything we can, and will continue to enforce the law.
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There are so many awesome things you can do with the board, that I'm still learning all it can do.
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Some people donate money; I donate time. There's never enough people to give time.
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I don't like to work and make money. I like to volunteer; it's more rewarding.
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Thirty years ago when I started, I was teaching kids how to work a cassette player. This is the futu...
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It's not fair that people who work, save, and pay for their cell phones are forced to fund the L...
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It's clear (in the recorded interview) his comprehension (of English) is not that great. They had cl...
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When I looked at it and did my homework on this issue, I concluded that a flat tax is better than a ...
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They had no life paddles, no life vests, no personal protective equipment. They weren't familiar wit...
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I was asked to sing with Mavis Staples on a gospel compilation called 'Oh Happy Day.' And, y...
PATTY GRIFFIN
Ordinary women attempt to change our bodies to resemble a pornographic ideal. Ordinary women constru...
SUSAN GRIFFIN
The men who still have the largest share of the power in society don't do any domestic work. The ver...
SUSAN GRIFFIN
Just as the slave master required the slaves to imitate the image he had of them, so women, who live...
SUSAN GRIFFIN
What is buried in the past of one generation falls to the next to claim.
SUSAN GRIFFIN
A story is told as much by silence as by speech.
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Philosophy means nothing unless it is connected to birth, death, and the continuance of life. Anytim...
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We known ourselves to be made from this earth.We know this earth is made from our bodies.For we see ...
SUSAN GRIFFIN
We're supposed to be a team, ... Team chemistry this year, baby.
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It is entirely appropriate for the administration to announce or espouse whatever political views th...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
It's occurred to me I need to laugh at myself more, and that I don't need to be some sad fol...
PATTY GRIFFIN
We're limited by recklessness. You must reach a standard where the conduct is wanton, inconsiderate ...
ED GRIFFIN
The legislation passed by Congress reflects the U.S. government's continuing commitment to nonprolif...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
God as 'He,' as a patriarchal thing, is offensive to me. It's standard fare for America,...
PATTY GRIFFIN
I'm sure (the Hayats) are disappointed, ... They really wanted their day in court to clear their nam...
JOHNNY GRIFFIN
Much of what was said was initially said by the cooperating witness, ... It was leading questions.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN
What this proves is that the government is not prepared to try this case, plain and simple.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN
Roane County lost a very good man in Tony Mason. He touched a lot of lives. I don't think I know any...
JOHNNY GRIFFIN
If Wildcat could not get information for the FBI, Wildcat would not be paid.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN
When I signed here, all I ever heard was I was overpaid, that I was an underachiever,
CORNELIUS GRIFFIN
He knew his son was being held and he believed they would let him and his son go if he cooperated.
JOHNNY GRIFFIN
They're rare as hens teeth and quite valuable, ... But we prefer to think of it as rare, and not the...
JOHN GRIFFIN
Currently, the Pegasus Pipeline runs through about 13 miles of the Lake Maumelle watershed and also ...
TIM GRIFFIN
He reached in my car, unlocked the door, ripped me out of the car and he actually threw me on the gr...
ROBERT GRIFFIN
We believe this venture safer and more affordable than any other spaceflight ventures that the U.S. ...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
Discussions on the San Antonio project are ongoing, and we are very optimistic.
JOHN GRIFFIN
So when the penguin takes a step, its center of mass is low, so when he stops coming up over his leg...
TIM GRIFFIN
We're eating Ramen Noodles — chicken and beef — that's what we eat everyday.
AHMAD GRIFFIN
We ain't got no family out here. All the football team — that's our family.
AHMAD GRIFFIN
We are largely deferring utilization (of the station) and we are paring logistics (flights) to the b...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
It is exactly the type of enterprise which should be left to industry and the [commercial] marketpla...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
It's interesting to note that John Kerry refused to debate John Edwards one-on-one during the Democr...
TAYLOR GRIFFIN
The Bush-Cheney campaign looks for a vigorous debate at the appropriate time. But John Kerry should ...
TAYLOR GRIFFIN
Wash your fresh fruits and vegetables before you eat them. Peel your fruits and cut out any parts th...
PATRICIA GRIFFIN
Right now, we're still addressing what the implications are on the shuttle launch schedule, and if I...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
Right now, we're still addressing what the implications are on the shuttle launch schedule. If I don...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
Obviously, we've been beaten up pretty well.
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
We're going to try as hard as we can to get back in space this year because we have a big constructi...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
This time, it was Michoud's turn to take a bullet for the team,
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
Right now, we're still addressing what the implications are on the shuttle launch schedule, and if I...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
My heart goes out to all the people affected by this hurricane, ... I will be visiting Stennis and t...
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
I will be visiting Stennis and the Michoud Assembly Facility soon to talk with our people.
MICHAEL GRIFFIN
The reality is that from an investigative standpoint, we may have (seized) firearms that are not pro...
DAVID GRIFFIN
I am honored to perform with Joe Negri and the Slippery Rock Chamber Choir this Saturday. He is such...
RYAN GRIFFIN
That's where the seed was planted,
ARCHIE GRIFFIN
That's where the seed was planted. Some of the alumni said, 'Wouldn't it be great if Ohio State play...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN
We're going to continue to put a lot on them mentally and see how they absorb it and how they react ...
MATT GRIFFIN
I spent the day with the pigeons, on a bench in Trafalgar Square, my bag of belongings huddled to my...
KATE GRIFFIN
Masculinity is a terrible problem, as we construe it and shape it.
SUSAN GRIFFIN
It was pitch black out there so I got the family together and said a prayer, ... We decided to leave...
BARBARA GRIFFIN
Luckily one of us came to our senses.
BARBARA GRIFFIN
We were well prepared for the storm,
BARBARA GRIFFIN
The first day passed, and the storm was not so bad. Tuesday we stayed. And Wednesday we swam our way...
BARBARA GRIFFIN
I didn't want to leave Sunday,
BARBARA GRIFFIN
I do hope it will turn out really nice for the guys.
BARBARA GRIFFIN
We´re going to have fully certified teachers that have had a background check and it´s going to be...
ANNETTE GRIFFIN
We couldn't get a play called in the defensive huddle either. We're going, 'What? What?' But that's ...
CORNELIUS GRIFFIN
Usually wheat germ comes in tablets, but you want the oil. That's one little secret, especially for ...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN
One of the biggest things a lot of people around here do - one of the celebrities turned me on to it...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN
We need about four or five days of really good weather and good winds.
ANTHONY GRIFFIN
This decision comes as a welcome relief for the families who were ostracized and harassed because th...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN
If Katrina did anything, it woke people up to the power of Mother Nature. When Katrina hit this coun...
ANTHONY GRIFFIN
If Katrina did anything, it woke people up to the power of Mother Nature.
ANTHONY GRIFFIN
That's where the seed was planted, ... Some of the alumni said, 'Wouldn't it be great if Ohio State ...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN
These students are truly in a league of their own. Each student nominated for the award has gone abo...
ARCHIE GRIFFIN
It wasn't really discussed, but it's the kind of game you'd think TV would jump on with both feet,
ARCHIE GRIFFIN