Bubbles. On a scale of one to ten, a bubble bath has to rank zero as far as things I'd expect an older-than-dirt-badass vampire to indulge in. The only thing that would surprise me more would be if you pulled out a rubber ducky.

-Kira to Mencheres

Does no one think to warn people before they meet me?" Vlad muttered, shooting an irritable look at Mencheres.

Get stuffed, don't you have more publicity stunts to pull?" Bones shot back. "How about chatting with another writer who can smear your name into greater popularity?"
"What, did Anne Rice not return your calls, mate?" Vlad asked scathingly. "Jealousy is such an ugly trait.

I don't lack for bed partners, so I don't need to scrounge for unwilling scraps.-Spade

You'll drain me dry, but not my neck, and you'll beg me to stop before I'm finished." -Bones

That’s right, Justina!' he said more than
once. 'We’re going to knock those demons out and slay them with the power of Jesus. Hallelujah, can I get an amen?