Black Friday – (AKA Zombie Apocalypse)

Is an event of subset half-dead human like beings confronted with ravenous bloodthirsty monsters preparing to pummel down the doors mid-afternoon on Thanksgiving Day.

Holy shit." Rehv shook his head and muttered, "Now we know what the zombie apocalypse looks like.

You take all of our pain, you are the spine. You are the blood soaked rag that holds closed the wounds in our soul.

Plus, I wondered if any of these celebrities were alive; or if Brangelina was now a zombified couple.

Seventy-five percent of the time when I'm ordering my "almond milk matcha latte with no sugar added, lukewarm, please," I'll be recognized by an employee. And yes, my order is a pin in the ass, but I'm determined to enjoy the liquid indulgences of modern life. Might as well take advantage of it all before the zombie apocalypse. I have no practical skills; I'm fully aware that I'll be one of the first ones "turned." Instead of learning motorcycle repair or something else disaster-scenario useful, I'll order the drink I want until I become a shambling corpse.

AND I WON'T BE DEFENSIVE ABOUT IT, OKAY?

My Zombie apocalypse plan is simple but effective; I fully intend to die in the very first wave.

Seems more logical than undergoing all kinds of hardships only to die eventually anyway (through bites/malnutrition/or terminally chapped lips)