FastSaying

Be sure to lie to your kids about the benevolent, all-seeing Santa Claus. It will prepare them for an adulthood of believing in God.


Scott Dikkers

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ANDY ROONEY God wants your soul for all eternity. All Santa requires is cookies and milk... One night out of the...
PAUL HENDERSON Later that day I went back to the old turf-house door and drew back the ivy. There between the stone...
ALICE TAYLOR There is something about these old people seeing Santa Claus that really cheers them up. This may be...
DELBERT TEILLE God is Santa Claus for Grown-Ups.
OLIVER MARKUS There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is...
BOB PHILLIPS I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he a...
SHIRLEY TEMPLE We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we ...
KAREN ARMSTRONG When children start putting together in their minds that Santa Claus may not be real, they'll ask qu...
HELEN EGGER I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store a...
SHIRLEY TEMPLE BLACK I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store a...
SHIRLEY TEMPLE That story you heard? About how we were all created by a super-powerful dude named God who lives up ...
ERNEST CLINE Everyone thinks of God as a man - you can't help it - Santa Claus was a man, therefore God has t...
PATTI SMITH God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time.
BIL KEANE The other day I bumped into Santa Claus. A good bump it was, too! I ought to have been arrested, for...
HALFORD E. LUCCOCK God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat
HENRY LOUIS MENCKEN Reach out and help others. If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. Be a vessel, be the c...
GERMANY KENT I think we're still going to get a bit of a Santa Claus rally. But I'm not sure how substantial it's...
TOM SCHRADER Be the girl you want your daughter to be. Be the girl you want your son to date. Be classy, be smart...
GERMANY KENT The benevolent God of Light will forgive your sins.
YU WO So you say there is no Father Christmas,                                        ...
M.C. FRANK The more God is glorified the more man is energic and the more satan is weak.
INDONESIA123 I think we have to believe in things we don't see. That's really important for all of us, wh...
JAMES CAAN Atheists say that God and Jesus is just a fantasy, yet they teach their kids that Santa Claus and hi...
FRANCESCO NICHOLAS CECE The only reason you'd want to own it is if you believe in Santa Claus.
JAMES FENKNER History is like Santa Claus: a language construction. We have some registers about the existence of ...
ALVARO ENRIGUE Time determines the occurrence of possibilities and impossibilities, but God determines the time for...
ERNEST AGYEMANG YEBOAH It's sort of like Santa Claus left a present under the tree for everybody and leaves it open to liti...
HEIDI MCINTOSH 1. Santa Claus is real. However, your parents are folkloric constructs meant to protect and foritfy ...
CATHERYNNE M. VALENTE Your country can be a footstool for God, if he finds people in all spheres of life who will prepare ...
SUNDAY ADELAJA We're like their Santa Claus. It's kind of special and we make them feel normal.
ENRIQUE GARCIA I like to play Santa Claus for people; I like to cheer people up.
DELBERT TEILLE Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.
ALFRED E. SMITH Nobody shoots at Santa Claus.
ALFRED SMITH (Bush) can get all the money he wants out of Congress 'cause of this disaster, the people will be so...
DICK MORRIS On Christmas. "Santa Claus represents God on assistance," said Clyde.

"Santa Claus...
MILTON ROKEACH It has been hard to fit Scott in, but we are aware of his record and I'm sure he will do very well f...
MARTIN ALLEN My father managed shopping malls when I was a kid, and my high school job was to dress up in an elf ...
KAREN DUFFY The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
STEVEN WRIGHT The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.
STEPHEN WRIGHT Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven...
H. L. MENCKEN Heck, I think they've even brought Santa Claus in.
BOB SCHLAG I believed in Santa Claus until I was 12!
DANIELLE DE NIESE You shall always find what you created in your mind, for instance, a benevolent God or an evil Devil...
HANS BENDER These issues should not be resolved with a Santa Claus yarmulke.
SHEILA GORDON He had a broad face and a little round belly, That shook, when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly...
CLEMENT C. MOORE, LL.D. You know, in a way, 'Dear Santa Claus' is rather stuffy... Perhaps something a little more intimate ...
CHARLES M. SCHULZ Christmas present from Russian Santa Claus.
PAVEL DATSYUK I don't really know how my family and friends will react to seeing me on screen in a cinema. I&#...
BEN HARDY I'm concerned about my daughter because she will not believe in Santa Claus. No matter what I sa...
SALMA HAYEK The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
LEMONY SNICKET Be kind. We never know what people are going through. Give grace and mercy because one day your circ...
GERMANY KENT The best thing you can do for your kids is to show them God working in you on a daily basis.
CRAIG GROESCHEL Just like Santa Claus, a farmer works all year on a commodity, and at the end of the year he gives i...
RONALD DAWSON The key is not the will to win. Everybody has that. It is the will to prepare to win that is importa...
BOBBY KNIGHT Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.
FRANCIS PHARCELLUS CHURCH Prepare your hearts for Death's cold hand! prepareYour souls for flight, your bodies for the earth;P...
WILLIAM BLAKE A good many things go around in the dark besides Santa Claus.
HERBERT HOOVER Kindness is universal. Sometimes being kind allows others to see the goodness in humanity through yo...
GERMANY KENT Wake every morning with the same feeling. Live up high and fly on top of the ceiling. I just know th...
ANA CLAUDIA ANTUNES Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist....
ARLO GUTHRIE It had been like discovering that Santa Claus was secretly a Nazi.
BRANDON SANDERSON The will to win is not nearly as important as the will to prepare to win.Everyone wants to win but n...
BOBBY KNIGHT Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We sta...
W. C. FIELDS Dare to follow your own paths.
Dare to be yourself.
Dare to be different.
LAILAH GIFTYAKITA Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!
FRANCIS PHARCELLUS CHURCH Make sure that your kids or the kids in your life have an opportunity to share their ideas, and to t...
ADORA SVITAK If you can not be sure about something unbelievable, do not jump to conclude it as hoax. If you are ...
TOBA BETA Seeing, touching is believing!
THOMAS FLAJNIK - ANTICHIMERAPODAL They would have booed Santa Claus in there if he had the hide to advocate a No vote.
HENRY MORRIS June and John were the folks who invited Santa and Mrs. Claus to the concert.
DORA MURRAY They would often pull on his beard and say he must be the real Santa Claus,
VAN ORDEN Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit everyone once a year.
Santa Claus has the right idea: visit people once a year
VICTOR BORGE We know we have kids who can catch and kids who can throw and we preach it all the time about hangin...
AL WOLSKI Ronald has had bicycle safety and safety in the home. Yes, Ronald is McDonald's, second most rec...
JIM CANTALUPO I'm not sure why the saying goes..."be careful what you wish for"...it should be, "prepare yourself ...
C. NZINGHA SMITH Santa is like a queen bee. All the elves are his drones, who exist to feed him royal jelly, which I ...
THOMM QUACKENBUSH Seeing how the kids react, smiling and all, that makes it all worth it. I let the kids shoot me some...
CHRIS LASOYA In the years since his murder, we have transformed King into a kind of innocuous black Santa Claus.
TIMOTHY B. TYSON Wales v England is one to tell your kids about. The game everyone wants to be a part of. To play aga...
JOHN HARTSON PEOPLE DIE.
This is the fact the world desperately hides from us from birth. Long after you fin...
DAVID WONG So, you're the Santa Claus of the magic world with a naughty and nice list?
ZOE FORWARD In this life it is good to have the experience of raising a child from infant stage to adulthood,be ...
DAVID ATTA (A.K.A DAVIED ATTLARS & MR DAIN) Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
VICTOR BORGE I had this grand idea that Elvira's kind of the Santa Claus of Halloween - at the malls, you'...
CASSANDRA PETERSON His problem is that he doesn’t want anyone until he can have anyone he wants.
CLIFFORD COHEN I'm more of a seafood guy. If they had a Lobster Bowl I might be looking like Santa Claus.
JONATHAN SCOTT This is the ultimate in feel-good projects. To make money and make people happy, it's a Santa Claus ...
CRAIG BELSER If SANTA CLAUS came down the chimney in a f**king jogging suit, you wouldn't even know it was him.
WAYNE COYNE If we talk about the environment, for example, we have to talk about environmental racism - about th...
DANNY GLOVER As a coach, you prepare your kids for this type of battle all year long and hope they respond to the...
BRAD SHEFCHIK It sounds silly, I know. But for me, the power of music rests in its ability to reach inside and tou...
TIFFANIE DEBARTOLO No matter what, I always make it home for Christmas. I love to go to my Tennessee Mountain Home and ...
DOLLY PARTON I was staring at one of the most famous images of Santa Claus of all time — one by Thomas Nast, fr...
PHILLIP ANDREW BENNETT LOW All right, so you believe in Santa Claus, and I'll believe in the 'Great Pumpkin.' The way I see it,...
CHARLES M. SCHULZ If you ever have to steal money from your kid, and later on he discovers it's gone, I think a good t...
JACK HANDY God puts people in our lives on purpose so we can help them succeed and help them become all He crea...
JOEL OSTEEN Be encouraged. Hold your head up high and know God is in control and has a plan for you. Instead of ...
GERMANY KENT Be nice to people... maybe it'll be unappreciated, unreciprocated, or ignored, but spread the love a...
GERMANY KENT

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SCOTT EASTWOOD All the songs we do are basically about one of three things: booze, sex or rock n roll.
BON SCOTT There's a very big part of me that just wants to take all of comics history and toss it on the b...
SCOTT MCCLOUD You see people who are disenfranchised elsewhere coming to Comic Con and making lifetime friends. I ...
SCOTT AUKERMAN My parents traveled a lot, so my grandparents practically raised me. My grandmother and I really bon...
HILLARY SCOTT ... It's perfect! Locke would appreciate it."

"Bug," Calo said, "Locke is our brother and...
SCOTT LYNCH When I had no work and all this time on my hands, I couldn't get a date. Now that I have women bangi...
SCOTT WOLF The hardest single thing you do is get the bloody screenplay right.
RIDLEY SCOTT Now, many public libraries want to lend e-books, not simply to patrons who come in to download, but ...
SCOTT TUROW Crooked Warden, I will fear no darkness for the night is yours," muttered Locke, pointing the first ...
SCOTT LYNCH You see, freedom has a way of destroying things.
SCOTT WESTERFELD To say that my anxiety is reducible to the ions in my amygdala is as limiting as saying that my pers...
SCOTT STOSSEL We ought to be bragging about Florida!
RICK SCOTT The very idea of making shoes by hand boggled her mind.
SCOTT WESTERFELD Now,young lady,I suppose you're here for a work assignment."
Work?" Tally said.
They both ...
SCOTT WESTERFELD I keep two sentimental mementos on my desk to remind me of two favorite men. There is an inkwell tha...
SCOTT TUROW