Barzellette matematiche I (*)
Un biologo, uno statistico e un matematico sono seduti un caffè e guardano alla gente che passa.
Un uomo e una donna entrano in un palazzo dall'altra parte della strada. Dieci minuti dopo ne escono accompagnati da un bambino.
"Si sono riprodotti" dice il biologo.
"No" ribatte lo statistico. "È un errore nell'osservazione. In media sono sia entrate sia uscite due persone mezza".
"No, no, no" interviene il matematico. "È del tutto ovvio. Se adesso entra qualcuno, il palazzo sarà vuoto".

(*) Lo scopo principale di queste barzellette non è farvi ridere, ma mostrarvi che cos'è che fa ridere i matematici e consentirvi di sbirciare in un angolo oscuro del loro ambiente culturale.


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I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in abo...
JON STEWART
You can tempt me, desert me, or cause me great pain; you can create a dark world that my cause me to...
CHRIS STEWART
There are few men more superstitious than soldiers. They are, after all, the men who live closest to...
MARY STEWART
It is harder to kill a whisper than even a shouted calumny.
MARY STEWART
Once a new technology rolls over you, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road...
STEWART BRAND
When a fantasy turns you on, you're obligated to God and nature to start doing it right away.
STEWART BRAND
If I had my career over again? Maybe I'd say to myself, speed it up a little.
JIMMY STEWART
Remember you are just an extra in everyone else's play.
STEWART EMERY
You can't put equipment on your gravestone. * Ian Stewart's father about the risks he was taking.
MR STEWART
Just every moment with Dick Cheney has been my favorite. Here's what I wonder about Dick Cheney, and...
JON STEWART
Historic in a good sense, not historic in a sense of 'so we dropped bombs on everyone.'
JON STEWART
Why can't they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand g...
JON STEWART
We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the b...
JON STEWART
For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't… you know, it's inter...
JON STEWART
But we are at war, and we here at THE DAILY SHOW will do our best to keep you informed of any late-b...
JON STEWART
Yes! Finally captured Martha Stewart. You know, with all the massive and almost completely unpunishe...
JON STEWART
When a fantasy turns you on, you're obligated to God and nature to start doing it right away.
STEWART BRAND
When a fantasy turns you on, you're obligated to God and nature to start doing it - right away
STEWART BRAND
GOP strategists hope the revelation of Kerry's wealth might debunk his status as a, quote, man of th...
JON STEWART
Abortion is inherently different from other medical procedures because no other procedure involves t...
POTTER STEWART
Censorship reflects a society's lack of confidence in itself.
POTTER STEWART
Censorship reflects a society's lack of confidence in itself. It is a hallmark of an authoritarian r...
POTTER STEWART
You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were sw...
JON STEWART
Having played many roles of scientific intellect I do have an empathy for that world. It's been ...
PATRICK STEWART
I never feel any aggravation from the public.
ROD STEWART
I support Alice Waters in her desire that there be a vegetable garden at the White House. I don'...
MARTHA STEWART
If a relationship is going wrong, if a marriage is going wrong, the answer cannot simply be to say, ...
RORY STEWART
I've now got a 35,000-word document of quotes from people who hate me, a lot from the 'Guard...
STEWART LEE
Here's the point - you're looking at affirmative action, and you're looking at marijuana...
JON STEWART
Nothing is too controversial, but you have to think about how to do it with sensitivity. I don't...
STEWART LEE
Cherish sunsets, wild creatures and wild places. Have a love affair with the wonder and beauty of th...
STEWART UDALL
I love cities. New York, Montreal, London, Amsterdam, Tokyo, Hong Kong, Singapore, Sydney, Melbourne...
STEWART BUTTERFIELD
Like ministers of information, consultants condense the message, smooth out the dissonances, unify t...
MATTHEW STEWART
Yes, I'm a patriotic person. For these people who disgrace the American way and burn our flag an...
PAYNE STEWART
The evening sings in a voice of amber, the dawn is surely coming.
AL STEWART
I have a microphone on one ankle and an ankle bracelet on the other, so I'm well balanced today.
MARTHA STEWART
People are disappointed when they hear my American accent because they regard 'The Police' a...
STEWART COPELAND
In New York, I get a tremendous amount of ideas by looking at the paintings and the sculptures, adap...
MARTHA STEWART
In my life, there have been people that I was convinced would be around forever, and yet, somehow th...
ALANA STEWART
The more storage you have, the more stuff you accumulate.
ALEXIS STEWART
Over the long haul of life on this planet, it is the ecologists, and not the bookkeepers of business...
STEWART UDALL
I never stop making sure that what I say is the best of what could be said about a particular thing....
MARTHA STEWART
I'm thrilled to be asked to host the Academy Awards for the second time because, as they say, th...
JON STEWART
I have planted over 6,000 trees at home in Scotland, some of them oak. I'd like my children to b...
RORY STEWART
About 80 percent of the photos on Flickr are public and searchable by everyone. In one sense, it'...
STEWART BUTTERFIELD
I am quite shy and people think I'm aloof.
KRISTEN STEWART
Censorship reflects a society's lack of confidence in itself.
POTTER STEWART
Ethics is knowing the difference between what you have a right to do and what is right to do.
POTTER STEWART
To force a lawyer on a defendant can only lead him to believe that the law contrives against him.
POTTER STEWART
In fact, a fundamental interdependence exists between the personal right to liberty and the personal...
POTTER STEWART
Swift justice demands more than just swiftness.
POTTER STEWART
A person's mere propinquity to others independently suspected of criminal activity does not give...
POTTER STEWART
It must always be remembered that what the Constitution forbids is not all searches and seizures, bu...
POTTER STEWART
The dichotomy between personal liberties and property rights is a false one. Property does not have ...
POTTER STEWART
The 4th Amendment and the personal rights it secures have a long history. At the very core stands th...
POTTER STEWART
I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material but I know it when I see it.
POTTER STEWART
Fairness is what justice really is.
POTTER STEWART
Why is it that if you take advantage of a corporate tax break you're a smart businessman, but if...
JON STEWART
I think romance is anything honest. As long as it's honest, it's so disarming.
KRISTEN STEWART
Growing up in the '60s and early '70s, with the space flight and the Apollo program, I alway...
STEWART O'NAN
Wherever I was in the world, at the beginning of every consulting project, one thing was certain: I ...
MATTHEW STEWART
I would eventually leave the business in 1999 to work full-time as a writer, but during the previous...
MATTHEW STEWART
I go into it with the attitude that I'm not going to look at my leg, and as soon as they get the...
TONY STEWART
I am a racer. I'm not a race car driver. I am a racer. I race. That's what I do. I don't...
TONY STEWART
I grew up in Solihull, on the edge of what was then the Birmingham conurbation. It was a good place ...
STEWART LEE
I've aged well because I've had to take care of myself.
ALANA STEWART
I found that Scottishness and Englishness are actually strong, instinctive things, whatever the hist...
RORY STEWART
I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house...
JON STEWART
A dying man needs to die, as a sleepy man needs to sleep, and there comes a time when it is wrong, a...
STEWART ALSOP
The only reason I look back is to check if I've been doing something wrong. I look at things fro...
STEWART LEE
You go through life wondering what is it all about but at the end of the day it's all about fami...
ROD STEWART
My mom was a professional fitness competitor, so I go into the gym with her. I train with my dad and...
BOOBOO STEWART
It's hard to actually take details from your personal life and apply them a scene because, as mu...
KRISTEN STEWART
I really, specifically, love acting, and I think it's a really cool thing to be really indulgent...
KRISTEN STEWART
I would never cheapen my relationships by talking about them.
KRISTEN STEWART
I have brothers, and that so-called boyish quality was something that I was deathly self-conscious a...
KRISTEN STEWART
But, I'm kind of a control freak. I get really freaked out if I don't know what's going ...
KRISTEN STEWART
I want a cheeseburger so badly, but I have to be a vampire in a few weeks.
KRISTEN STEWART
I would have been very happy just working from job to job, paying my rent one movie at a time. I nev...
KRISTEN STEWART
I do want to work on writing, because writing's a skill. Writing is something that you can train...
KRISTEN STEWART
It's a funny thing: You want so badly for people to see what you do - you're proud of it - a...
KRISTEN STEWART
Girls are scary. Large groups of girls scare the crap out of me.
KRISTEN STEWART
Success is always something completely different to people. I feel like I've succeeded, if I'...
KRISTEN STEWART
Sure, 'Twilight' is really huge right now and everybody's freaking out over it, but it w...
KRISTEN STEWART
I had to act in a school play when I was about ten years old. I really didn't want to do it. But...
KRISTEN STEWART
I have really bad luck with my thumbs. It plagues me, actually. It drives me crazy! Both of them are...
KRISTEN STEWART
I go outside, and I'm wearing a funky T-shirt and my hair is dirty, and people say, 'What...
KRISTEN STEWART
I just really am trying, trying, all the time. But I like to be scared. I love to suddenly feel out ...
KRISTEN STEWART