Anyone who dies with more than $1.15 to his name is a jerk.

Any man who has $10,000 left when he dies is a failure.

My name is Earl and I'm a jerk.

I had now made about 45 pictures, but what had I become? I knew all too well: a phallic symbol. All over the world I was, as a name and personality, equated with sex.

The rest of my life will be devoted to women and litigation

If there's anyone listening to whom I owe money, I'm prepared to forget it if you are