ABC's Monday Night Football held a telethon for hurricane victims Monday when the Giants played the Saints. It went just as expected. Two days later, President Bush called and volunteered to conduct the pre-game coin toss.

The (NFL's) new television deal will add Thursday and Saturday night games to the Sunday and Monday games. Advertisers believe the more marriages they break up, the more beer they will sell.

Jackie Robinson was honored in the U.S. Capitol Wednesday. What a ceremony. It doubled the number of statues in the rotunda because when it was mentioned that he was a lifelong Republican and Richard Nixon supporter, the Democrats turned to stone.

John Kerry's brother Cameron Kerry said Tuesday he wants to run for Secretary of State in Massachusetts. He's a lawyer in Boston. Imagine if he goes further in politics, John Kerry could have a future as the embarrassing brother of the president.

Pakistan test-fired its first cruise missile Thursday in a blatant attempt to intimidate India. It flies beneath radar. If they attacked India with a nuclear cruise missile it could wipe out the entire United States customer service industry.

Officials say the only thing Los Angeles will have to build is an Olympic pistol range. What's wrong with the freeways we already have?