A survey found that ten percent of those questioned thought Joan of Arc was Noah's wife...

Marriage is like life in this-that it is a field of battle, and not a bed of roses.

In a novel, the hero can lay ten girls and marry a virgin for the finish. In a movie, that is not allowed. The villain can lay anybody he wants, have as much fun and as he wants cheating, stealing, getting rich, and whipping servants. But you have to shoot him in the end.

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.

I never married. Nobody ever asked me.

Whenever a husband and wife begin to discuss their marriage, they are giving evidence at an inquest.